"Master Chief: The Movie"
(Part 1) (Part 2)

Movie part 2

October 3, 2008
Run time
6:45 (Part 1)
9:18 (Part 2)
16:03 (Total)
Guest starring
Talkany Big Robot as CATS
Talkany Nerd as Jack Thompson
Talkany Strong Man as Sergeant Johnson
AT&T Mike as Anonymous
AT&T Crystal as Nurse
Talkany Little Man as Recruiting Scientologist
AT&T Audrey as Old Woman

Master Chief: The Movie is a movie prequel to Master Chief Sucks at Ordering. It was released on October 3, 2008, the one year anniversary of the series.


Part 1Edit

Movie part 1

The King observes Master Chief's birth

The King explains that 15 years ago, the UNSC created a supersoldier called a SPARTAN, and that this is his story. The baby Master Chief is shown and a nurse argues with Sergeant Johnson about gender roles. Suddenly, they notice the King looking in the window; neither the nurse nor Johnson seem to recognize him. Five years later, the nurse explains that Master Chief has aged four years for every year that passes due to accelerated aging, but still has the maturity of a five year old. Master Chief joins Johnson's unit and meets the Arbiter, and begins their friendship by tricking him into watching 2girls1cup. Johnson then puts Master Chief through a series of "difficult" exercises (really a montage of leisure activities set to "Morning Train"), and then he and the Arbiter are left on base duty. An explosion occurs, and they meet CATS.

Part 2Edit

CATS introduces himself and reveals he will detonate a bomb inside the base the next night at midnight. Master Chief and the Arbiter spend the next day looking for help, as Sergeant Johnson and the rest won't return until it's too late. Master Chief meets Jack Thompson, who takes the case to find CATS. Meanwhile, the Arbiter tries to get help from the Church of Scientology, but when they try to rip him off he is saved by Anonymous. Master Chief accidentally angers Jack Thompson by mentioning GTA, and he and the Arbiter return to the base that night as CATS arrives. Suddenly Johnson and a large army appear to try and stop him, but CATS detonates a mini nuke that kills the soldiers, inadvertently revealing the location of his bomb in the process. Master Chief disables the bomb, then forces CATS to endure a great deal of physical labor and watching High School Musical (again set to "Morning Train"). He and the Arbiter decide to leave the military and move in to an apartment. Master Chief assists an elderly woman with ordering at McDonalds, and she suggests that he give advice more often. Master Chief decides to make a video series about giving advice. After the credits, the King approaches the Arbiter and recruits him to join the Network, a secret society that controls the world.


Part 1Edit

Master Chief The Movie (Part 1)

Master Chief The Movie (Part 1)

Part 2Edit

Master Chief The Movie (Part 2)

Master Chief The Movie (Part 2)



  • First appearance of Sergeant Johnson.
  • First mention of the Network.
  • The scene where Master Chief is born and the King is seen watching through the window has been replayed twice from different perspectives. Master Chief time traveled to this scene and gave Johnson the idea for his own armor. ("Master Chief Sucks at Time Travel") During this scene, the King had a confrontation with Ronald and they had a short duel. ("Master Chief: The Secret Origin of the King")

Bloopers and continuity errors

  • Master Chief says he is going to play Halo while he waits for Jack Thompson. However, this scene occurs in 1998, several years before Halo was released. It is possible that in Master Chief Sucks at Ordering's universe, Halo was released earlier than in real life.

Cultural references

  • The scene where the King watches baby Master Chief through the window is a reference to the Lost episode "Cabin Fever," where Richard Alpert watches baby John Locke through a window.
  • When Anonymous introduces itself to the Arbiter, they give a speech filled with words starting with the letter "A". This is a reference to V for Vendetta (the origin of the Anonymous masks), where V gives an introduction speech filled with words starting with the letter "V."
  • 2girls1cup is an infamous Internet video depicting graphic and disturbing pornography between two women. The video is often used in bait and switch pranks on forums.
  • The "Morning Train" montages are references to the similar montages that occur in two episodes of Seinfeld.

Episode references

Master Chief Sucks at Ordering
Season 1MinisodesSeason 2Meet the AncientsSeason 3
Main characters
Master ChiefThe KingThe ArbiterCortanaRonald McDonaldCATSHillary Clinton
Recurring characters
Jack ThompsonAvery JohnsonTom CruiseThe Angry Video Game NerdChris HansenBarack Obama343 Guilty SparkL. Ron HubbardChad WardenBill GatesReggie Fils-AimeOprah WinfreyJoe BidenSteve JobsThe Voice
UltraHyperShadowDigitalPh33rZombamazombaList of charactersTimelineBattlesTropesTrailersPostersBloopers and continuity errorsCountdown